Grief: Managing Memories After a Loss

Grief: Managing Memories After a Loss

When a loved one dies, you could feel sorrowful again, sometimes even years later. The agony of loss is frequently made worse by reminders. You will have a better chance of advancing in your healing if you know what to expect and how to handle reminders of your loss.

On the anniversary of your loved one’s passing or during other auspicious dates throughout the year, grief could reappear. These terrible feelings, often referred to as an anniversary reaction, do not have to prevent you from healing. Their presence shows how much you valued and missed your loved one.

There are reminders everywhere

Some tributes to your loved one might be required, such as remembering the occasion of their loss, honoring their birthdays and anniversaries, or taking part in novel activities you know they would have enjoyed. Even ceremonies held in remembrance of other people can cause you to experience the sorrow of your own loss. Depending on the loss, they may occur when a person gives birth to a kid or when their eldest child completes college and moves away.

Sights, sounds, and fragrances can serve as triggers for memories as well. And when you least expect it, they could surprise you. While driving, you might pass a restaurant that your loved one liked. Or you play their favorite song on a playlist, and all of a sudden, you find yourself filled with emotion.


The course of grief is unpredictable. A loved one’s passing anniversary can trigger strong memories of the feelings and events that surrounded their loss. They may last for many days at a time or even longer in some circumstances. You might experience the same intense emotions and reactions on anniversaries as you did the first time you lost a loved one, including:

Depression Shock
Angry Outbursts
Guilt Difficulty Sleeping Fatigue

Years after a loss, when you come across recollections of your loved one’s demise, you could still feel depressed. As you continue to heal, take action to deal with remembrances of your loss.

Be ready

Reactions to anniversaries are common and often predictable. Knowing the likelihood of experiencing it can help you get ready for how you will react to it and increase your chance of recovery.

Think ahead

Plan your current successful techniques for any impending or anticipated reminders. When you might feel more alone or encounter reminders, plan a visit with friends or relatives.

Consider and feel

Instead of only mourning your loss, think back on your loved one’s wonderful qualities and the times you shared. It’s crucial to recognize that it’s appropriate to feel emotions, including sadness. It’s also crucial to give yourself permission to experience other feelings, such as joy and happiness.


One illustration is to dedicate a tree or make a donation in your loved one’s name. Getting things done and producing results may be therapeutic and healing.

Place relationships first

Pay attention to your relationships with friends and family. Draw near to them and take solace in their support and presence. Maybe think about signing up for a grieving support group. Make time for your faith, prayer, and hearing from God. This can be difficult, but maintaining healthy relationships throughout your healing process is essential if you want to start living again.


Grief never expires, and emotions to anniversaries could throw you into a tailspin. Even so, as you move through the agony of your loss, grieving typically becomes less strong with time.

Consider speaking with a grief counselor if your grief doesn’t seem to be getting better over time or if it’s getting in the way of your ability to go about your regular business. Depression, bodily ills, and many mental health issues can result from unresolved bereavement. However, with expert assistance, you may maintain your healing progress and reclaim a sense of direction and control in your life.

We are here for you if you’re ready to start the process of conquering your grief. Our staff of compassionate therapists at New Vision Counseling and Consulting is extremely skilled in assisting you in working through loss and building a life you want to be a part of. Please give us a call at (405) 921-7776 as the logical next step. Hopefully we’ll see you soon!

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