GASLIGHTING: WHAT IS IT?
In order to manipulate you, a person may use gaslighting, a sort of psychological manipulation, to deny your reality and make you doubt your own emotions. Narcissists frequently employ this tactic to acquire what they want and assert their dominance over others. They keep it in their back pockets. Controlling people who abuse their relationships emotionally frequently engage in this. You probably feel a great deal of self-doubt or even question who you are if you’re in a relationship with someone who gaslights you. However, romance is not the only situation in which gaslighting is used to manipulate one partner in a relationship. Boss, friend, or family member manipulation is possible. The harder it is to maintain your composure, though, the closer you are to the gaslighter.
How can I tell whether I’m being discriminated against?
After reading this article, you could start to recognize a power imbalance in relationships where one party is gaslighting the other. Despite evidence to the contrary, it may appear as though this individual never does anything wrong and always has the upper hand. Your perspective of reality may be altered by a spouse who gaslights you, leading you to doubt your own judgment. They frequently act destructively or dismissively and then refuse to accept responsibility for their behavior. They won’t acknowledge your damaged sentiments and will use dismissal to get out of any situation. Those who gaslight people find it easy to place the blame on others. You are just making stuff up, after all. Keep in mind that as their hooks get deeper, you start to doubt your sanity. You’ll feel alone, inadequate, and unstable around manipulative people. Even worse, when you eventually summon the confidence to approach them, they always have an excuse.
COMMON LANGUAGE FOR GASLIGHTING
You overreacted.
You’re just being paranoid
You made me behave this way, so why do you keep bringing it up?
You are greatly exaggerating this.
A joke is too crude for you.
That’s entirely too sensitive of you.
Not a big deal, really.
Your insecurity is the only source of this.
That never occurred.
DISENGAGING FROM GASLIGHTING
Establishing boundaries is the first step towards escaping manipulation. Recognize the person’s emotions while gaslighting you, but let them know that you have your own truth. Your right to have your own emotions and your experience are both legitimate. Keep a journal of your interactions and experiences to help you remain steadfast in the reality of what occurred rather than the gaslighter’s deceptive spin. You may feel more rational as a result, and you may gradually regain your confidence. This will enable you to expose their lies once you start doing it. The sentences listed below can help you break their control over you. The majority of gaslighters will still try to push beyond any boundaries you impose, so be prepared to do so. Depending on the degree of gaslighting, you might occasionally verbally set a boundary and other times you might just leave the scene. These are merely a few things to think about or say.
I need to interrupt this conversation because I feel like I’m not being heard.
You don’t have to concur with me; I know how I feel.
I have the right to my own feelings, and if you keep telling me that they are unjustified or that I don’t understand, I’m going to go.
I understand that my experiences and perspectives are valid, but my experience was different, and if you keep speaking to me in this manner, I’ll have to hang up.
I’m done with this conversation until you’re ready to examine my points of view.
Don’t know what to do? WE CAN AID!
We are available to you if you need assistance regaining your self-confidence. Being aware of your mental abuse and escaping it are two different things. We are aware of how daunting it might be to confront someone who has been gaslighting you. Here, we give you the resources you need to establish healthy boundaries with the other person as well as inwardly. They don’t have to respect your opinions if they employ gaslighting to accomplish what they want. One method to begin releasing yourself from their grip over you is to ask for space or let them know that you will communicate with them when they can be fair and courteous.
We will give you the confidence to leave behind circumstances that are gaslighting you at New Vision Counseling and Consulting. We are thrilled to have the chance to help you on your way and provide you the tools you need to stop just getting by and start living a life you love. We’re eager to tailor your counseling experience to your unique needs and look forward to hearing from you. Call (405) 921-7776 for more details and to get started right away.